Getting REAL About Our Bodies
I have a confession to make. I LOVE staying home and doing nothing. I just do! I consider myself a professional when it comes to excuses to not do something, especially if it's something out of my comfort zone. That's why it's so easy for me to understand when someone wants to book a session but has several (valid, of course) reasons why they're not able to do it. I get it, truly.
Now, part of my job is to be a problem-solver. I'm here to answer any questions, no matter how big or small, and to generally put your mind at ease. Don't think you have the money? I can get a payment plan that works for you. Not sure what to wear? I have both local and online suggestions, as well as an ever-growing accessories closet that my stylists and I pull from with you specifically in mind. Worried you'll look silly or not know what to do with your hands? I've been coaching women in posing for YEARS and know exactly how to move you or what to say so you'll look your very best. Trust me, there won't be any duck lips or a misguided "sexy face" to worry about! I have answers to nearly every question and a way for ME to make it work for YOU.
Oh, did you catch that? Yeah, I said "nearly" any issue can be solved, because there is one that always seems to be the fallback, and it's the one that is the hardest to fix. "I just need to lose "x" amount of pounds, then I'll be ready." I hate that one, and I mean HATE it. It's like a physical knife twisting in my heart every time I hear a woman say this, because I know that this one is the kicker. This is the REAL reason to be scared or nervous, and it's not an excuse, it's an actual fear. The fear of coming up short or not looking good enough is something basically everyone deals with, and the hardest for me to defend, because I GET IT. I mean, I really get it. I've had issues with my own body for as long as I can remember and, even though I genuinely find beauty in all the women in my life, finding it in myself is a struggle. I understand when my clients have the same feelings, and I wish I had some magic mirror I could hold up to them and show them all of the beauty I see.
But, wait. The fact is that I DO have that. That's EXACTLY what a boudoir or glamour session is all about. It's my job to show you how beautiful you are RIGHT NOW, because the fact is that you are, you always have been, and you always will be.
When I was 23, I used to look at photos of myself at 18 and think "wow, I was so pretty then! Look at my skin, and how thin I looked, and how tan I was!" I would tell myself that it was my peak, and I'll never look that good again. Every photo I tried to take of myself at 23 seemed to pale in comparison.
Then, when I turned 26, I thought the same thing about photo of myself at 23. 23-year old me was in such good shape, while my current 26-year old self was starting to get rounder, and my face grew wider. I would look in the mirror at the stomach I couldn't stand and then back at those photos of a wispy little 23-year old. I thought "when I look like that again, THAT'S when I'll take more photos. That's when I'll be happy again."
Of course, life goes on, and time goes by faster as we get older. I suddenly found myself turning 30 and looking back at 26-year old me. I looked at my body and thought the same thing I always thought when I looked back on old photos. "Wow, look at me! I was so beautiful! Look at the soft curve of my stomach, and the womanly shape of my face." Suddenly I realized what I was doing, and it felt like I was looking in an infinity mirror. The 30-year old me longed for 26-year old me, who wished she was 23-year old me, who only wanted to look like 18-year old me. The fact is that I was beautiful at EVERY ONE of these phases. I didn't look the same, and my standards of what I found beautiful changed over the years, and I had never, at any point, not been worthy of feeling that beauty. It was always there, and it will always be there.
As a woman, it's not up to us to look for validation in the form of others, but it doesn't hurt to get a little help sometimes. Having someone tell you how stunning you look, or how healthy and happy you've seemed lately, or just giving you the extra boost of confidence you need to go a little bit longer in life with that reassurance that you're beautiful now. When a woman says "just let me lose ten pounds" or "just let me get back to my pre-baby weight," I just want to yell 'No! You need it more now that ever!" I can almost promise that you'll look back in a few years and wish you had just gone for it! It's MY JOB to show you that your beauty is constant and no amount of your body changing will change that. So come back ten pounds later if that's what you want, but don't be afraid to let me show the beauty you already possess.
I don't know that I will ever be able to convince women how beautiful they are until I get them in front of my lens, but I can PROMISE you that you'll see it once you're there. You're perfect now, and you'll be perfect if you gain ten pounds, and perfect if you lose it. You're not alone in feeling that way, and you'll be surrounded by a small, positive team of women who TRULY BELIEVE you are beautiful, and we will show you exactly that.
Check out our Ultimate Dream Shoot Planner for all the information you need, and you can book directly from our website. We know exactly what you're going through, and will show you how beautiful you truly are with genuine love and appreciation for you just the way you are. And just for a little fun, here are a few of me from 18, 23, 26 and now. You'll probably find it hard to see too much of a difference, but I think that goes to show that we're all our own worst critic, and I hope that my photos and words will put some of your own worries at ease.
Love, Amber Lane
